Category Archives: Dark

Darkness Today

The darkness looms in my head, can’t shake it, won’t go away, no reason for this feeling, no where to run and hide.

I have an amazing woman, who loves me for all that I am, my precious baby, my pet, who is always by my side.

Emptiness clouds my soul, need to run away, want to crawl under the covers, hide my self from this day.

Tomorrow will be better, I tell myself, though I know this may not be the case, all I know my skies are grey.

 

Longing for only a touch, touch my cheek look in my eyes, tell me you love me, you need me, don’t know why.

I look out the door looking up above, asking God to give me a sign a blessing, as I stare at the darkening sky.

Overwhelmed, never let them down, hard to go on, perfection can’t be found, try my best all I can say.

Never leave, always stay, proud of me regardless of the grade, don’t know why, just hold me I pray.

 

Days like this in the past, I would pray that God would strike me down, take me home, from this place.

No more thoughts like that, just want comfort in my soul, tell me all is ok, bring peace in to my space.

Soon things will change my smile will never leave, I know the truth, just like reading the treasured book.

Reel me in bring me home, make me your own, feel my soul, I am the fish that you have on the hook.

 

Lighting the Darkness

Enter in to my dark world to stay

Take my hand let’s go out to play

Pain is all around the place we go

Death and despair no place to grow

 

Look in to my eyes I will take your soul

Making you my own my only true goal

Eyes so blue, love that shines so bright

The darkness fades your eyes are my light

 

You show me a new way to live my life

No more deep scars buried by the knife

Hope joy love is the new path I found

My chains gone no longer feel bound

 

Bound by the fear in me that daily arose

Now heart is open and freely flows

Flows of love, joy, hope and pure happiness

Now the darkness is gone and no more sadness

 

Pet my life is owed to you my saving grace

You hold me, sing to me take me to your place

One day I promise to return the favor

My love for you eternal will never waiver

No Good Bye’s

Chest heavy, pain for days, need relief, truly afraid to die

Love can’t be reached, too scared of a permanent good bye

Nurses all around, poking, prodding, hooking up the electrode

Take this pill, it will make you better, hoping I don’t code

 

Truly scared, is something I never knew, wanting to remain

Remain on this earth, no heaven yet, but I feel much pain

Love finds me, tells me she cares, I still remain in fear

Hide my fear from her eyes, I will be ok I promise my dear

 

Doctor comes hastily in, says your heart is truly in tact

What a relief, I thought I was having another heart attack

All is good to her I say, close your eyes and dream of me

For you are my dream, to forever to be with her my only plea

 

 

Self Loathing

The pain, the pain from the drops of the rain

cause my brain, to try to sustain, but all in vain

Emptiness, desperation, broken, desiring love not to get

Thought of darkness, saved by my the compassion of my pet

 

drunk on spirits, drunk on desire, drunk on passion

Letting go, holding on, change of heart, ready for action

Alive in spirit alive in passion, ready for another dance

700 miles away, your words are inspiration, glad for the chance

 

The chance to know, the chance to care, the chance to feel

Feel the caring of another again, hoping this is all for real

broken promises i think are of the past, broken hope no more

self denial gone for good, inner peace has found in me galore

 

Hoping this is not another nightmare to endure

I think the words and caring is nothing but pure

The yes bring joy to my heart, keep me close 

Angel from heaven I found, pretty as a rose